
Courtesy of travellerspoint.com
Families in Mexico do not have the same funerals as typical North Americans, unless you live in New Orleans. I know this because the Chiapa de Corzo cemetery is at the end of my street; which means that on many days loud Mariachi music will pull me to my balcony. The first time this occurred I immediately wondered if I had missed some local holiday and scampered out of the door with my camera to be surprised by a white hearse, Mariachi musicians and a group of people slowly making their way along the street, followed by a caravan of 8 vehicles inching behind them.
This happened again today and has now (unfortunately) has become commonplace, and yet, I am always drawn to my balcony when I hear the music. Mexican culture has a different attitude towards death and funeral customs. All we need to do is to look at the customs around the Día de la Muerte/Day of the Dead; or as North Americans call it, Halloween; or, the Christian name of All Saints Day. This is a two-day event where families have a picnic at the graveside of their relatives; relating stories about the children, weddings, and other important events the dearly departed have missed attending. The most that many North American might do is to place a flag on the grave of a veteran on November 11th, or flowers on Memorial Day, but those traditions are slowly fading away for us Yankees.
Mexicans seem to accept death as a normal part of life and participate in regular communion with the dead. Catholic influences in Mexican culture are particularly prominent in their death rituals. Children are not shielded from death or dying so as they mature it become normal.
Families spend up to two days with their loved ones. The body is kept in the house mourning the loss (as my great grandparents did), usually laid in a simple coffin. During this mourning time friends visit, prayers are said, gifts of food or sometimes money is given to the family. This might be akin to a “quiet” Irish wake when people come together to eat, and talk of times “when”.
As in ancient Egypt, items of importance are buried with the person for use in the afterlife. According to Mexican belief, the deceased person begins a new life after they are buried. If we believe that we have a soul and that there is another dimension into which we pass, we might also want to take something with us. Often in the death of a child, we would put a toy or stuffed animal in the coffin to add comfort for the journey.
There is a “wake” after the death and before the burial when family members say prayers and make sure that there is a candle burning at each corner of the coffin to maintain good luck in the afterlife. This wake may last all night and many friends will come and share their memories with each other. Candles are a large part of this culture and you see them sitting on the grocery store shelves not far from the paper goods. I have candles in every room of my apartment, even the bathroom; but, only for power outages.
Another difference between North American and Mexican funerals is that emotions are encouraged, as it is good to release the energy of sorrow and loss. Everyone is free to “let their feelings show” at the loss of the person in the family or community; and after the burial people continue to say prayers for nine days (novenas) to assist in the journey to the other side; and. again the mourners unabashedly show their grief.
Not as loud or showy as a New Orleans funeral procession or as raucous as an Irish wake, but not as solemn as funerals in the “new world” either. It is as if they are leaving for a journey and friends an family are coming to see them off … Hasta Luego – you’ll be missed, but we will see you later!